This packet may be used as a series, a retreat, or individual lessons that may be used for talks. However you choose to utilize the packet, it is suggested that you begin with the Chastity Chart as a quick overview to lay the foundation for a correct understanding of chastity. During a “chastity” talk or retreat, it is very easy to get off on a tangent like dating, sexual sin, modesty, etc. and by the end of the talk or retreat not even the definition of chastity has been given. Below is the link to the chart with a quick summary. Please read the following summary, while looking at the chastity chart.

CHASTITY CHART

1. What is Chastity? Many times we think the answer is “don’t have sex”, “be pure”, etc. It is good to go straight to the Catechism of the Catholic Church. Chastity is the successful integration of the sexuality within a person…a complete and lifelong mutual gift.

What is integration? What is segregation? The most common example of segregation in America is racial segregation in the 20^th century. Segregation divides and separates, causing much pain. Satan’s plan is to divide and separate.  One way he does this is by diving and separating the sexuality within a person.

2. What is our sexuality and why is our sexuality the gift of our self? Sexuality is not only how we give ourselves to others, but what we give to others. We are spiritual, physical, intellectual, creative / communicative, and emotional beings. We give the gift of ourselves through all of these areas. As soon as we segregate these areas, we are not practicing chastity. Once we integrate these areas, giving them all, in the correct way, we are practicing chastity.
 
ACTIVITY – SPICE
Before going into what human sexuality is and showing the SPICE chart it might be good to first ask: Do you know who you are? You can even write up “S” “P” “I” “C” “E” on a board and ask the group what they think these letter stand for and how they make up who we are. These six things: spiritual, physical, intellectual, communicative, creative, and emotional are not only “who” we are but “what” we give. Another option is to break up the group into five small groups, giving each group a poster board with one of the letters. One group would write all the ways that a person is “spiritual” and how they give themselves “spiritually” to another. Each small group would take a different letter.

3. Who are we ultimately giving the gift of our self too? God. This is important. To be chaste is the desire to give the gift of self (all components) to God. This is the first priority. Read Luke 10:27 and Matthew 5:8 at the bottom of the chastity chart.

4 & 5. So how do we give the gift of ourselves to God? How do we integrate all the components of the gift of self? We can think of two things: a filter and a funnel. What does a filter do? A filter purifies. In the case of chastity, it progresses through stages or filters. Why do the components need to be purified? Due to concupiscence, we have the tendency to not direct our selves toward God but rather a way from God. This turning away from God leads to impurity in all areas rather than purity. It is our family, friends, close friends, and state in life that helps filter and thus purify the gift of self.  What does a funnel do? A funnel keeps something going in a direction. If we are putting oil in a car or liquid in a bottle, we use a funnel so that none of the oil or liquid spill over, but rather reaches the destination. “Drink water from your own cistern, running water from your own well. How may your water sources be dispersed abroad, streams of water in the streets? Let your fountain be yours alone, not one shared with strangers…” [1] Our water sources is our sexuality and it cannot just be given to anyone, it cannot “be dispersed abroad” or “spill over”, but rather should be directed toward God and given to those God intends us to give it to, and always in purity. Chastity is both the filter and funnel. It is the virtue that purifies the gift of self and ensures that it is directly toward God.
 
6. What is the purpose of the sexual act and how do we know when we are using the sexual act or sexual activity contrary to its purpose? The sexual act is a part of the bigger picture of chastity. In the chart we see that the sexual act should only take place in the state of life called marriage. Marriage is only one of the seven stages in the filter and funnel. The sexual act, which tends to be the primary focus in chastity talks properly finds its place and purpose within marriage. This packet goes in depth into section 2352 of the Catechism of the Catholic Church which states: “The deliberate use of the sexual faculty for whatever reason outside of marriage is contrary to its purpose.”

7. It was mentioned in section 4 & 5 that the gift of self should not “spill over”. What happens when the gift of self is misused or “spills over”? What does that look like? Section 2351 to 2356 gives a description of what it looks like when the gift of self is not funneled or filtered. These nine offenses against chastity are serious sin and segregate our sexuality, thus perverting it and directing it not toward love of God, but rather a false love of self. Instead of the person being a gift, they are an object in which to be used and disposed of.

This ad shows the true order of love. Eros (passion) love, is ordered toward and develops into a philio (friendship) and ultimately into agape (sacrificial) love. Within marriage a man and woman are united and the end result is openness to life, procreation.

Jason Evert explains the importance of modesty of men and women.

[1] Proverbs 5:15-17
[2] This sentence, which is the outline of the Chastity 2352 booklet, is taken from a declaration of the Doctrine of Faith entitled Persona Humana. Pope Paul VI approved this Declaration "On certain questions concerning sexual ethics," confirmed it, and ordered its publication at an audience on November 7, 1975.